THIS is what I get for not taking my own advice. All of you out there in blogland. LEARN from my mistakes. Gather 'round and listen to my tale of WOE.

I've been experiencing an abundance of tomatoes. I am one of the few people that I know that have so many tomatoes so soon and I've learned that it is because I planted absurdly early, almost a month before everyone else. I got lucky we didn't have a late freeze. Well, I popped my head out the side door and asked if my neighbor would like some tomatoes and she was delighted. She came over to get some and then asked if I would like a couple of zucchini to take to work. NOTE: THIS IS THE MOMENT OF MY GREATEST MISTAKE! I said "Sure!"

Twenty minutes later I notice a youngster walk past my porch, then a few seconds later, another. I look up and there is a parade of young people each bearing the gift of a mammoth zucchini marching past my front porch. The littlest neighbor was struggling under the weight of it. I wandered out onto the porch and had to bite my tongue to keep from crying out in fear and horror. The little ones were barricading my exit with zucchini. I can still hear their march-march-marching, like ants to the picnic. The mother, my neighbor, stood supervising, steely eyed, cigarette hanging out of a corner of her mouth, arms crossed in smug, self satisfaction.

Thankfully my fellow mantis midwife, Kris, took several to bake (I kid you not) a chocolate zucchini sheet cake. I will try to get a picture and if it is as delicious as she claims, I will try to coerce her to do a guest blog with recipe.

So take heed readers, and learn from my errors in judgement. Do not leave an open invitation to a neighbor with too many zucchini. Do not leave your porch unguarded. They will use fear tactics, force and their own children to strong arm you into accepting their "gifts". The children seemed so happy, I imagine that they will have a good nights sleep tonight, having cleared the extra zucchinis off of their little beds, until tomorrow that is.